Defining a Good

Relationship

There are several characteristics that make up good, healthy working relationships:

• Trust – This is the foundation of every good relationship. When you trust   your team and colleagues, you form a powerful bond that helps you to work and communicate more effectively. If you trust the people you work with, you can be open and honest in your thoughts and actions, and you don't have to waste time and energy "watching your back."

• Mutual Respect – When you respect the people who you work with, you value their input and ideas, and they value yours. Working together, you can develop solutions based on your collective insight, wisdom and creativity.

• Mindfulness – This means taking responsibility for your words and actions. Those who are mindful are careful and attend to what they say, and they don't let their own negative emotions impact the people around them.

• Welcoming Diversity – People with good relationships not only accept diverse people and opinions, but they welcome them. For instance, when your friends and colleagues offer different opinions from yours, you take the time to consider what they have to say, and factor their insights into your decision-making.

• Open Communication – We communicate all day, whether we're sending emails and IMs, or meeting face to face. The better and more effectively you communicate with those around you, the richer your relationships will be. All good relationships depend on open, honest communication.

MONDAY - MARRIAGE MONDAY

WEDNESDAY - HOW TO BUILD HEALTHIER WORK RELATIONSHIPS

FRIDAY - Special Guest

How to Build Good Work Relationships

So, what can you do to build better relationships at work?

• Develop Your People SkillsGood relationships start with good people skills. Take our How Good Are Your People Skills?   quiz to find out how your "soft skills" are. For instance, how well you collaborate, communicate and deal with conflict. This self-test will point you to tools that will help you to deal with any weaknesses that you have.

• Identify Your Relationship NeedsLook at your own relationship needs. Do you know what you need from others? And do you know what they need from you?
Understanding these needs can be instrumental in building better relationships.

• Schedule Time to Build RelationshipsDevote a portion of your day toward relationship building, even if it's just 20 minutes, perhaps broken up into five-minute segments.
For example, you could pop into someone's office during lunch, reply to people's postings on Twitter   or LinkedIn   , or ask a colleague out for a quick cup of coffee.
These little interactions help build the foundation of a good relationship, especially if they're face-to-face.

• Focus on Your EIAlso, spend time developing your emotional intelligence   (EI). Among other things, this is your ability to recognize your own emotions, and clearly understand what they're telling you.
High EI also helps you to understand the emotions and needs of others.

• Appreciate OthersShow your appreciation whenever someone helps you. Everyone, from your boss to the office cleaner, wants to feel that their work is appreciated. So, genuinely compliment the people around you when they do something well. This will open the door to great work relationships.

• Be PositiveFocus on being positive   . Positivity is attractive and contagious, and it will help strengthen your relationships with your colleagues. No one wants to be around someone who's negative all the time.

• Manage Your BoundariesMake sure that you set and manage boundaries   properly – all of us want to have friends at work, but, occasionally, a friendship can start to impact our jobs, especially when a friend or colleague begins to monopolize our time.
If this happens, it's important that you're assertive   about your boundaries, and that you know how much time you can devote during the work day for social interactions.

• Avoid GossipingDon't gossip – office politics   and "gossip" are major relationship killers at work. If you're experiencing conflict with someone in your group, talk to them directly about the problem. Gossiping about the situation with other colleagues will only exacerbate the situation, and will cause mistrust and animosity between you.

• Listen ActivelyPractice active listening   when you talk to your customers and colleagues. People respond to those who truly listen to what they have to say. Focus on listening more than you talk, and you'll quickly become known as someone who can be trusted.

“Marriage Monday”

Marriage is a journey through life as a couple. When you first get married, life is full of bliss and you can't imagine spending one minute apart from the one that you love. Over time, the new excitement of your partnership starts to fade away, and you get used to living together and the daily routines that you fall into. It is at this stage that some couples get lost in the routine and lose the spark of what brought them together in the first place. You get busy, and sometimes forget what things were like when you first said, "I do." Keeping a marriage strong takes works.

Here are five secrets to making your journey as a married couple a healthy and exciting one.

1. Open Communication

Communication is essential to your Relationship. Nobody likes to feel like they are left in the dark with regard to what the other partner is feeling, or with decisions that need to be made in the household. Make it a point to keep your spouse up-to-date with what is going on in your life, and what you are thinking about

5 Communication Mistakes You Didn't Know You Were Making in Your Relationship

• You don’t ask Interesting Questions - Treat both as Common

• You use the Wrong tone of Voice

• You take your Partner for Granted

• You Avoid having Conversations

• Your not Actively Engaging

1. Mutual Respect and Admiration

When you love someone, you should respect and admire that person. Each partner in the marriage should consider the other person's feelings and what is on their mind. It is perfectly normal to have moments of miscommunication, confusion, and not understanding where the other person is coming from, but two married people need to support and respect each other.

1. Date Nights

The concept of dating should not be lost when you get married. Dating is what brought you together as a couple in the first place. Take time out of your busy lives to get dressed up and spend an evening together as a couple away from home.

• We stop being Creative in our Dating

• We stop having Fun in our Dating

• We stop doing getaways together alone

1. Constructive Disagreements

2. Look beyond your own Triggers

3. Seek to Understand

4. Look for Similarities, not Differences

5. Use Positive Language

1. Keep Life Fun

2. Engage in Activities Together

3. Set Expectations with Each other

4. Find other forms of Intimacy

5. Never Stop Trying Win Each other

“Trust is What Makes

Leadership Possible”

“Your character communicates your leadership”

What does trust look like?

• Consistency

• Honesty

• Discipline

• AUTHENTICITY (We need to be aware of any masks we may be wearing)

Think about those leaders you don’t trust

• Are they pretending to be someone else?

• Does their ego overshadow their true authentic self?

The best way to build trust is through…

• Competence

• Connection

• Character

• We have 100% control over these three items!

• These are the most compelling aspects of leadership!

“Don’t believe that trusting people is too risky Not trusting people is actually a greater risk!”

Being in a “suspicion mindset” leads you to:

• Over-validate and over-analyze everything

• Everything slows down & costs go up You become stuck in mediocrity

• You become insecure & protective

Take action to restore broken trust

• It’s a myth that broken trust cannot be restored

• In most cases lost trust can be restored

• It’s a tremendous growth opportunity…a chance to work on character & competence

• It can become a great opportunity for forgiveness & extending trust

Boost Your Influence and

Exceed Your Personal Goals

In 2009 and 2010, Discovery Learning, Inc. and Innovative Pathways conducted research to identify and measure influence styles.  They created five categories: 

• Asserting: you insist that your ideas are heard and you challenge the ideas of others

• Convincing: you put forward your ideas and offer logical, rational reasons to convince others of your point of view

• Negotiating: you look for compromises and make concessions to reach outcomes that satisfy your greater interest

• Bridging: you build relationships and connect with others through listening understanding and building coalitions

• Inspiring: you advocate your position and encourage others with a sense of shared purpose and exciting possibilities

1)      Understand your influencing style.  It all begins with self-awareness.  What’s your dominant style?  Do you assert, convince, negotiate, bridge or inspire?  Do you tend to apply the same approach to every situation and individual?

2)      Take stock of your situation.  Who are the critical stakeholders you need to win over to achieve an objective or overcome an obstacle?  What influencing style might be more effective as you interact with them? 

3)      Identify your gaps.  Once you understand your natural orientation and the appropriate styles to influence those around you, figure out where you’re on solid ground and where you need to shift gears and use a different approach to be more effective.

4)      Develop.  After identifying your gaps, find ways to develop in those areas.  It might be a workshop, coach or internal role model who is particularly strong in the style you’re trying to develop.

5)      Practice.  Begin with small steps – low-stakes situations where you can test out your new influencing approaches.  Target a person or situation where you’d like to achieve a certain outcome, think through the influencing style that will work best in that situation, and give it a try.

Inspiring Others To Make a

Positive Change for Themselves

Here are 5 Ways to Napier Others to Change Themselves

“You can’t force anyone to change but you Can Inspire them to”

Inspiring others comes in myriad different forms. Here are nine leadership guidelines to inspire others:

1. Focus on relationships. One of the first quotes I heard upon entering my current career was, “Nobody cares how much you know, until they know how much you care.”

1. Leave ego behind. If you really want to influence people, let your actions speak for themselves.

“Learn or Leave your Ego, Logo, and Promo at the Door”

1. Identify winning.

Redundancies arise when communication falters.

1. Listen actively. There are two types of listeners: those who seek to understand, and those who seek to be understood.

1. Build your resilience. Displaying just how much you can handle -- physically, mentally, emotionally -- can be awe-inspiring to others. Everybody likes hearing stories of the parent who lifted a car to save a child, or the uncommon rags-to-riches success story. When you do more, you become more.

Unleashing The Best

Here are the 5 simple ways you can unleash your personal potential to help you reach a higher ground and achieve greater success in life:

1. Set a target and work towards it

Always start with a purpose and a goal. What is your intention, and what are the things that you want to be, do, and achieve in your life?

Life is like shooting an arrow. If you want to hit the bull’s eye, you must first identify the target. Some of you will go to work today and do the same thing you’ve been doing...SET YOUR TARGET HIGHER!

2. Raise your standards

The next thing you can do to unleash your potential is to raise your standards.

First, you must not compare yourself with others because your only competitor in your life is yourself. You just need to do better than yourself. 

“Raise your standards and you will rise along with them.” – Mastin Kipp

3. Maintain your self-confidence

Your self-confidence is important when it comes to unleashing your maximum potential. When you are confident, you perform better. One of the easiest ways to increase your self-confidence is through preparation.

“Work everyday to be Ready” 

“It is better to be prepared for an opportunity and not have one than to have an opportunity and not be prepared.” - Les Brown 

4. Build your momentum by taking baby steps

Success is a journey and not a destination.

You need to build your inertia and maintain your momentum by making consistent progress. A river cuts through rocks not because of its power, but because of its persistence. Just like a river, that’s what you need to unleash your greatness.

“I start early and I stay late, day after day, year after year, it took me 17 years and 114 days to become an overnight success.” – Lionel Messi

5. Consistently pursue personal growth

You cannot grow and become better if you are not willing to learn. 

If you’re not willing to learn, no one can help you. If you’re determined to learn, no one can stop you.” The key is to commit to constant and never-ending improvement. Each day, you have to strive to get better than yesterday.

TODAYS ACTION PLAN

“Decide to OutGrow who you are Today, and Be Ready to Grow into who you will be Tomorrow”

Leading With Love

“faith working through love.” Galatians 5:6 NKJV

Here are 19 Ways Leaders Lead with Love

1. Lead with authenticity.

Make sure your words and actions are always congruent.

2. Lead with character.

Do the right thing--not because you think others are watching, but because it's who you are. Build a reputation for delivering what you say you will do--and if possible, do even more.

3. Lead with awareness.

Get outside your mind and inside your heart, and ask yourself what you really want.

4. Lead with courage.

Make it a habit to do the things that you're afraid of doing, and to face the things that scare you.

5. Lead with wisdom.

Wisdom comes from living and leading, and knowledge comes from learning. Try to find wisdom in each experience.

6. Lead with focus.

Be selective in what you take on and finish what you begin with thoroughness, energy and resolve.

7. Lead with motivation.

Start by motivating yourself with whatever is needed to get the job done. You'll achieve more and inspire others.

8. Lead with collaboration.

To have influence, you have to delegate. Show respect for the talent of others and strengthen your work by bringing to the table as many voices as you can.

9. Lead with honesty.

Successful leadership is rooted in honesty--the best policy from the standpoint of leadership and business relations. Honesty begets honesty, and truth begets truth.

10. Lead with problem-solving.

Seek solutions rather than problems--then subject those solutions to hard work, action and accountability for results.

11. Lead with respect.

The respect you give does far more for you than the respect you receive. Give respect with a whole heart.

12. Lead with vision.

Vision is the art of seeing the invisible and the impossible. When you lead with vision you provide direction to others--the essence of leadership.

13. Lead with values.

Define your values clearly to yourself and keep them front and center in everything you do.

14. Lead with loyalty.

Stand by those who are working for what is right, even--especially--when things go wrong.

15. Lead with trust.

Trust comes from character and competence. When you lead with trust it brings you credibility, dependability and accountability.

16. Lead with integrity.

Your integrity is everything, so treat it with the greatest care. Make your words and behavior consistent and grounded in your values, and follow through on what you say and do.

17. Lead with humility.

When you can admit your mistakes and deflate your own balloon, you will have taken one of the most important steps on the road for success.

18. Lead with giving.

By giving you grow, and the deepest happiness comes from serving others.

19. Last but oh so very important! Lead with heart!

Your mind is a valuable tool, but it's the heart that always gives us what we need.

Leading with Hope

Wednesday September 16th

“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, But when the desire comes, it is a tree of life.”

Proverbs 13:12 NKJV

“When hope’s dream seems to drag on and on, the delay can be depressing. But when at last your dream comes true, life’s sweetness will satisfy your soul.” Proverbs 13:12 TPT

5 Ways Leaders Lead with Hope

1.  Hope Renews Faith

Hope resets your belief system and allows you to renew your faith in a message, person and/or people support groups to help you become more accountable for the betterment of yourself and others. 

2.  Hope Builds Self-Confidence

Hope builds our self-confidence and inspires us to believe that we are capable of achieving great things by enabling us to aim higher and work smarter.

3.  Hope Promotes Empowerment & Clarity

Hope broadens our observations and gives us the circular vision to see around, beneath and beyond the goals we seek. Hope allows us to translate complexity into clarity. 

• Hope invigorates our passionate pursuits of endless possibilities.  

• Hope gives us purpose and strengthens our will and ambitions.  

• Hope is the ultimate game changer that promotes the empowerment and clarity we all need to move forward with our careers and lives.

• Hope propels you during difficult times and infuses you with happiness and  keeps you moving towards your dreams, goals and aspirations. 

4.  Hope Helps Increase Productivity and Underscores a Positive Work Ethic

With points 1 - 3 intact, hope now allows you to think about your attitude and the approach and consistency of your work ethic.   Hope now allows you to be more resourceful with your time and the energy you give to your daily work goals

• Hope gives us more focus in our work and thus we begin to value ourselves in the process.

• Hope reminds us that we must be more entrepreneurial; that thriving, renewal and reinvention is a way of life.  

• You don’t need to be an entrepreneur, to be entrepreneurial but you must embrace the entrepreneurial attitude.  

• Hope gives us the right attitude to keep pushing when prudence says quit.

5.  Hope Instills Family Pride and Togetherness

Hope is a powerful force that brings people together.   It instills a sense of unity, collective pride and strengthens optimism when people work together as one

Leading with Faith

Monday September 14th

“Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love.”

1 Corinthians 13:13 NLT

“Thus says the LORD, your Redeemer, The Holy One of Israel: “I am the LORD your God, Who teaches you to profit, Who leads you by the way you should go.”Isaiah 48:17 NKJV

• Faith is not a blind leap into the dark, but it is a confident leap into the arms of God.

• Often the end is not in view when this leap is made, but the landing is never in doubt!

• Faith has the capacity to behold what the eyes cannot see.

• Faith cashes the checks God has written in His Word!

“And without faith living within us it would be impossible to please God. For we come to God in faith knowing that he is real and that he rewards the faith of those who passionately seek him.” Hebrews 11:6 TPT

Leading from fear, even a quiet, subtle fear, drains you of energy, and discourages your soul.

WHEN WE LEAD FROM FEAR WE...

1. Lead defensively. The result of leading from a defensive position is trying to protect what remains good rather than helping solve the problem, and thereby taking new and positive territory.

2. Lead reactively. Leading reactively is a sister to leading defensively.

The difference is that reactive leadership is often hasty due to pressure, lacking data and being unprepared. The result is poor decisions.

3. Lead thoughtlessly. You can see the connectivity in all three results of leading from fear.

Leading from faith is activated by:

1. Recalibrating your thinking.

• Set your Minds one things Above

• Renew Your Mind Daily 

• Meditate in your Mind His Promises 

2. Eliminate the non-essentials and focus on the Good News of the gospel.

“The Good News is that the Bad News is Wrong”

• What Does God say about my Situation

• Faith stands on Truth, not Opinions 

• Distraction brings Destruction 

3. Raise the practice of prayer to one of prominence

• When Prayer becomes a Habit, Success becomes your Lifestyle 

Creating my Work Flow

Friday September 11th

The Best Way to Design Your Life: Reconstruct Your Values

Here is the 5-step process we are going to work through today:

1. Establish core values

2. Determine your unique mission statement

3. Write out goals which align with your values and mission statement

4. Develop your action plan step-by-step

5. Follow through

1. Create a Work Flow and Work Schedule

Monday - Review, Research, and Plan

Tuesday - Meetings and Execution of the Plan

Wednesday - Futureing & Team Building

Thursday - Follow Up and Completing Tasks

Friday - Sabbath

Saturday - Prayer and Rest

Sunday - New Week Begins

Aligning My Priorities

Wednesday September 9th

“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”Matthew‬ ‭6:33‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Priorities:

• God

• Me

• Family

• Work

1. Find out where my time is going 

• Does your time spent working align with the work that matters most to your role?

• What gets in the way of spending time on your priorities?

• What tasks took more or less time than you thought they would?

• How well are you able to use small pockets of time? Do you work better when you have long periods of distraction-free time to focus on tasks?

2. Save me from the "planning fallacy" 

You can help them here by keeping them accountable to the work they're doing and reviewing their weekly plan and asking:

• Have they thought about what they'll need from other departments or how long research or gathering resources will take?

• Are they being realistic about how long a milestone will take to achieve?

• Can they be held accountable to this timeline?

3. Help me protect my "maker" time

• How much time are you spending on the Phone? 30%

• How much time are you spending on the Internet? 50%

• How much time are you spending on accomplishing the work? 20%

The Power of Prioritizing

Monday September 7th

“Time is the only thing you have that creates New Disciplines and New Routines”

“You don’t make Progress, Money or Even Success without Making Time”

“When you get a Fear and Respect of Time is when Your Life will Experience things you’ve never Imagined you Can”

• Prioritize your Work

• Spend Time Wisely

• Remove all Distractions

• Create New Disciplines and Routines

While writing his book, Master The Moment, Pat Burns interviewed employees at 50 companies and discovered that many of the time management issues employees face can be traced back to poor leadership, including:

• Not knowing what work to prioritize

• Having trouble saying no even when their workload is full

• Feeling overwhelmed with too many tasks

• Procrastinating or not finishing what they start because timelines aren't clearly set

• Always being in reactive mode due to an unclear strategy